today's a bad day...

Blue skies and windy outside and I am still laying down for the fourth day in a row. I think I have become a professional facebook gamer. It’s a good enough distraction from the pain, but it is starting be a constant reminder that I am doing nothing.

I stare outside the window and pretend I’m looking at the ocean. I wish I were scrapbooking or capable of reading a book. For all the hours I have sat and played facebook games, I could have completed many scrapbooks or read books that could enrich my life! It’s my life wasting away and it is THE MOST frustrating experience ever. I’m too anxious to read and I’m in too much pain to sit and scrapbook.

The last 3 days I have been in a deep depression. I feel like I am in a dark cave and I can’t see my way out. The fibro Twitter gang that I follow have been great! I feel like they can relate to what’s going on. My friends are worried and I feel incredibly sad about that, I just don’t know what to say or do. My husband is worried and I’d like to just snap my fingers and feel better. It just doesn’t work that way. I have to claw my way back to the light that is reality and make myself feel again. I feel broken.

I know I will have days that are good and days that are bad. I’m looking for my next good day to come soon…

Thanks for reading… stay cool!